Underhand Marriage: Should Be Banned?

Nowadays, underhand marriage (nikah siri) is booming. The great businessperson, Sheikh Puji, artist, like Dewi Persik-Aldiansyah Taher, and the great ‘ulama’, Aa Gym, did this kind of marriage. Do you know what the meaning of underhand marriage? There are three perspectives about what the underhand marriage means. Those are,

1. Underhand marriage is marriage without the presence of the family (wali nikah), and is done secretly. It is because the woman’s family disagrees and rejects.

2. Underhand marriage is legal marriage by the religion law, especially Islamic law, but the government, department of religion (KUA), does not authorize it.

3. Underhand marriage is secret marriage because particular reasonable considerations.

From the three perspectives above, we can conclude that the underhand marriage is an Islamic wedding performed by Muslim ‘cleric’ not authorized by the department of religion to perform marriage, and is often regarded as valid within Islamic law provided and witnesses presented. However, very often the underhand marriage is done secretly and without the presence of witnesses. Is it clear now?

Then, what are the reasons of people, for example, Aa Gym, who has good knowledge about Islam, doing this marriage? What are the advantages and disadvantages from the underhand marriage? Let’s check it out one by one!

Some people who take aside to the good points of underhand marriage say that first; this marriage is easier and more economical than the legal marriage. Why do they say that? Let’s compare! Underhand marriage just needs woman’s family (wali perempuan), witnesses, dowry (mahar), and wedding. It is simple, isn’t it? Whereas, the legal marriage needs many kinds of mail, registered in KUA, administrative cost, woman’s family (wali perempuan), witnesses, dowry (mahar), and wedding. The legal marriage spends a lot of time and money and bothers. Second, the couple can avoid the prostitutions because the underhand marriage is legal marriage by the Islamic law. So, no matter if they do some sex. Third, this marriage does not have the law’s strengthen. Therefore, if the couple wants to divorce, just let it go! Forth, the husband can give no responsible for giving the livelihood to his wife and his children.

Nevertheless, not all the people have the same point of view. Some of them agree, but the others disagree. Those who object the underhand marriage say that first; the underhand marriage has the weak law because it is not registered in department of religion. This impact is the wife cannot propose their marriage to the court. She cannot prosecute the husband, if she gets bullying. Second, their child does not have a status and birth certificate because making birth certificate needs legal marriage certificate. Therefore, their child will get difficulty when she/he wants to register in the elementary school. Third, if the husband dies, his wife and his children will not get the husband’s heritages. Forth, the underhand marriage is woman exploitation, because woman cannot get anything from such marriage, she will lose her virginity, her expectation to get the legal husband and the legal children.

From the pros and contras above, it is obvious that the underhand marriage should be banned. It is because it has more disadvantages than its advantages. The underhand marriage just gives the benefit for the man, not for the woman and their children. As result of the controversy, our government has launched a new bill of marriage that forbidding the underhand marriage. Moreover, the underhand marriage’s couple will face up the three months in jail or fines of up to Rp 5.000.000, while public servant who helps administer such marriage will face a maximum jail term of one year and/or fines of up to Rp 6.000.000. I think it is fair.